The Myths and Misconceptions of EMDR (& what you can really expect)

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) has gained a reputation as a bit of a mystery. Some think it’s a magic cure, while others picture it as some kind of hypnosis or pseudoscience. The truth? EMDR is a well-researched, structured therapy that helps people process distressing memories, shifting how these memories are stored in the brain so they no longer feel like they’re happening in the present. If you’re considering EMDR or just curious about what it actually involves, let’s break down some of the biggest misconceptions, what to expect, and how it really works.

Myths & Misconceptions About EMDR

1. EMDR is just moving your eyes back and forth.
While bilateral stimulation (eye movements, tapping, or auditory tones) is a key component of EMDR, it’s just one part of a much larger structured process. The real magic happens in how your brain reprocesses memories, making them less distressing over time.

2. EMDR erases bad memories.
Nope. You’ll still remember what happened, but it won’t hold the same emotional charge. It’s like turning down the volume on a once-overwhelming song—you can still hear it, but it doesn’t take over your entire experience anymore.

3. It’s only for PTSD.
EMDR is best known for treating PTSD, but research shows it can be effective for anxiety, depression, phobias, grief, chronic pain, and other trauma-related issues. It’s all about how unprocessed experiences get “stuck” and continue affecting daily life.

4. EMDR works instantly.
While some people feel shifts quickly, EMDR isn’t a one-session fix. It’s a structured process, and the early stages involve history-taking, preparation, and building coping skills before diving into memory reprocessing.

What to Expect in the First Sessions

Before you get to the actual reprocessing, your therapist will focus on history-taking and preparation. This helps ensure that when you do start processing memories, you have the tools to handle any emotions that come up.

1. History-Taking:
Your therapist will ask about past experiences, current struggles, and your goals for therapy. This helps identify which memories or themes to target later in EMDR.

2. Preparation & Resourcing:
Before jumping into the deep end, EMDR therapists help you develop coping skills (often called “resourcing”). This might include guided imagery, relaxation techniques, or creating a “safe place” in your mind—tools you can use if anything feels overwhelming during the process.

How EMDR Reprocessing Works

Once you’re ready, you’ll start reprocessing specific memories. Here’s how it typically unfolds:

1. Identifying the Target Memory:
You’ll bring up a distressing memory and notice the emotions, body sensations, and beliefs attached to it. For example, someone who experienced childhood bullying might recall a memory and notice thoughts like “I’m not good enough” or “I’ll always be rejected.”

2. Bilateral Stimulation:
While focusing on the memory, you’ll engage in bilateral stimulation—following the therapist’s fingers with your eyes, tapping on your knees, or listening to alternating tones. This helps the brain process the memory more adaptively.

3. Processing Negative Beliefs & Replacing Them:
As you move through the memory, your brain naturally shifts perspectives. That same person who initially believed “I’m not good enough” might start recognizing “That wasn’t about me—I was just a kid, and I deserved kindness.” The body sensations linked to the memory also begin to clear, so it no longer feels like an active wound.

4. Checking the Body for Residual Disturbance:
EMDR isn’t just about changing thoughts—it’s about making sure the body no longer reacts as if the trauma is still happening. By the end of reprocessing, there should be a sense of emotional resolution, even if the memory still carries some sadness or loss.

What to Expect After EMDR Sessions

Once a memory has been fully processed, people often describe feeling:

• Less triggered—situations that once caused distress may no longer have the same impact.

• Lighter and more present—like a weight has been lifted.

• A shift in perspective—gaining new insights about past events and themselves.

• Different reactions—previous patterns of avoidance, fear, or self-criticism may change in unexpected ways.

It’s also normal to feel a bit mentally or physically tired after EMDR. Your brain is doing deep work, and just like after a tough workout, it needs time to recover and integrate the changes.

Final Thoughts

EMDR isn’t about forcing a specific outcome—it’s about allowing your brain to do what it naturally does when it’s not stuck in survival mode. If you’re considering it, keep an open mind and know that while it’s not always a linear process, the shifts can be profound. Healing is possible, and EMDR is one way to get there.